Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.



Donate

 

Free to Be Me 

or, 

Hope is Out There

By Trish Barron January 2006  

 

I've been there, the non-alcoholic, in two of my previous marriages and spent 8 years not dating, not in any relationships re-finding that person that had been diminished to a person with no value at all. It took time to rebuild my self-esteem to be the person I still knew was deep within there. Somewhere deep inside was that independent, vital, personable, loving, caring person I started out as. I had been in a good marriage, but lost him in death. I stepped into the path of an alcoholic because I lost my sense of self when I buried my husband in that grave. A part of me went with him and I moved too quickly to find a Father for his children. I chose the worst possible person. I went from someone who would have been a loving, guiding person for his children, to a man who had to be in complete control, who belittled all around him to have any sense of his own self-worth. I took myself and my children down a tragic road.

I am in a totally different place in my life now. I had to find myself, that deep special being so trampled on by, not one bad marriage, but two. Then I had to forgive myself for taking my children through that pain as well. I watched two of them become alcoholics themselves. I also have seen one of them go through recovery and remain clean and sober for many years now, and mainly find the person deep within herself. I lost my son to suicide, where alcohol and drugs had a very strong bearing upon what transpired. I had to forgive myself for many things surrounding his life. My own poor choices exposed him to his own lack of self-esteem. Walking on eggshells, being battered emotionally daily, does not build strong character. It creates a need, deep within, of constant seeking of reaffirmation of your very being.

I am now the person I had always known I could be. I am strong, and have value within myself and to my children, my grandchildren, others I can help. I gather strength from my faith first, my talents I have been given to share with others, my words given to share with others, when least expected. I keep in mind that we never know the impact we may have had on another. I try to give that smile, kind word, supportive nod, helping hand, whenever I have any opportunity to do so. I hope to share strength and love daily in my life. I come from an entirely different place today. I like the person I am. I have found comfort in being the person I am today. I have many roads ahead to follow, but I plan to take this person down those roads. I see sunny skies and lots of flowers to smell along the way.

 

--Trish Barron (Ongoing Empowered Recovery 2006)

       


Important Web Security

Take Steps to Prevent Unauthorized and/or Abusive Partners From Discovering Your Internet Activities

Click Here

Survival Guide

The most powerful book available for resolving an alcoholic relationship!  

Alcoholic Relationship Survival Guide: What to Do When You Don't Know What to Do -- Must Read! Click Here for More Info!

[More Info]

eBOOK & PRINT VERSIONS AVAILABLE

Survival Audio

Real-Life advice from 

two experts on alcoholic relationships!

Candid Conversations - Alcoholic Relationship Survival Guide: What to Do When You Don't Know What to Do -- Must Listen! Click Here for More Info!

Candid Conversations Audio 

[More Info]

$12 Digital Download

Robin's Realm

Robin's Realm

 

Read an Alcoholic Relationship Survivor's Inspiring Articles and Poems